Wrecking wall. :P

My wall.
Every ache, every piece of my heart,
Mortar to the bricks.
Laid in time. In perfect shape.
Every tragedy, in a different form.
All in front of my eyes.
My strength. My protection.
My wall.
Every crack and every crevice.
That once was there.
Where from the light seeped through.
As did the cold rain.
Filled to the inch. With more of the same.
Never built a way out.
This was my safe space.
Why’d I ever need to?
Why go out and let someone else see?
How easily I could crumble?
That I can break at all.
When I can pretend Im indifferent.
And cold. And unfeeling.
Why show someone I need them,
When I could convince myself I didn’t.
That is what I always thought.
I built this wall to keep me safe.
But as it began to hide me from the world,
I could no longer pretend.
I had to bear my pain
And face my fears.
For each time I smothered my screams.
And each one of those tears I smiled.
For every moment I said I’m alright when I wasn’t.
I only weakened myself more.

Today, I won’t.
I will climb atop my wall.
I will scream till I can no longer speak.
And then I’d whisper my woes into the passing breeze.
And I will cry till the break of dawn.
I will let it all out. And then some more.
And into those arms, I will fall.
That come to hold me.
I will let myself be weak.
To be stronger again.
Today, my wall, I will break.
Today I will break free.
Today I will feel.